A Little Harmless Obsession Read online

  “Well, I see we stopped the trash talk that could be going on here,” Chris said as he sauntered into the kitchen. It was May’s turn to blush now. The idea that Chris had heard them talking was bad enough. When she noticed Evan standing there still as death she realized he’d heard the conversation.

  “You shouldn’t be eavesdropping,” Cynthia said.

  Chris wrapped his arms around Cynthia. “There are a couple of officers here to talk to you, May.”

  She nodded and turned to walk out.

  “You want me to go with you?”

  She could tell by the tone of his voice he wanted to, but allowed her to decide. Any other time, she might have, but for some reason she felt she needed to do this on her own.

  “No. I’ll call you out there if they have any questions.”

  She walked to Evan who was still standing there, seemingly frozen.

  “Evan?”

  He shook his head, apparently bringing himself out of the trance he’d been in. “What?”

  She thought she heard Chris chuckle behind her. She was within inches of Evan. Everything in her body sighed with lust just being that close.

  She licked her lips and was surprised when she saw his gaze drop to her mouth and follow the movement.

  “Could you move?”

  “Huh?” His focus was still on her lips. Heat brushed over her nerve endings.

  “I can’t get by you.”

  His gaze rose to hers and she thought she saw the stain of embarrassment on his cheeks, but she had to be wrong. Knowing Evan Chambers the way she did, there would be nothing that could embarrass him.

  “Sorry. In fact, I gave my statement to the officers, and since Chris is here I’m going to head home.”

  Oddly deflated, she nodded and watched him walk away from her…practically running.

  With a sigh, she followed his path but realized that he was already out of Dupree’s by the time she sat down with the officers.

  Evan bolted up out of bed, his body covered in sweat, his pulse beating like an out-of-control sledgehammer. An uneasy chill passed over his flesh, his body still shaking as he drew in big gulps of air. He looked around and realized he had just been dreaming—a nightmare he hadn’t had in years—until recently. The sheets were crisp, clean, Egyptian cotton. The air was clean and pure. He wasn’t in the dank motel room with his whore of a mother.

  He scrubbed his hand over his face, trying to pull it together. It had been years since he’d had the nightmares, but they’d returned a few months ago. He couldn’t fathom why, or how, except for the reason that his ménage with Cynthia and Chris seemed to be the catalyst. He was sure doctors would have a field day, but Evan didn’t give a damn. He didn’t want to get in touch with his feelings. He had banished the dreams once before, he’d do it again.

  With an aggravated sigh, he slid out of bed and headed to the bathroom to splash water on his face.

  He looked at himself in the mirror, wondering at the new lines around his eyes. He wasn’t a vain man, but he did realize he was growing older. Maybe it all circled around to Chris and Cynthia again. Their engagement last Christmas had been expected. Chris wanted kids, wanted a whole brood like the one he grew up with. It was something his friend talked about all the time. While Cynthia had stepped out of her family’s protective core, she still wanted the traditional family. Evan knew that wasn’t for him—never would be. Not with his background, with his mother’s tainted blood running through his veins.

  Irritated with himself again, he grabbed a towel and wiped off his face. He turned the shower on and stepped into it without waiting for the warm water. He needed something to wake him up, pull him from the memories he’d just fought through.

  As he lathered up his hair he let his mind drift back to Maylea and what had happened the night before. He’d definitely have a talk with Jason today. Chris wouldn’t step over the line because the kid worked for him, but Evan didn’t have that problem. Lately, anyone who even got close to her made him want to beat to them to a pulp. Now it seemed someone was pissed that she hadn’t paid enough attention to them.

  Granted, it could be someone she fired. Some people just didn’t know when to let things go. In fact, the last person she fired was Lee. Even though Chris had wanted to press charges, her powerful father was a defense attorney. He made sure his little girl didn’t go to jail. Normal people would have been upset, but Lee hadn’t cared. She didn’t like May, that was for sure, but Lee didn’t like most people. She’d moved onto the next man, the next job, without batting an eye. She was poison, and he should have known before getting involved with her. Lee knew exactly what buttons to push with him, and he hadn’t liked himself those few weeks they’d been together. But he’d been desperate…because of May.

  The last few months had been hard on his control. May drove him crazy with those little smiles or the gentle, lyrical laugh that could be heard throughout the restaurant. Women like her attracted all types of men. She was pretty, but not truly stunning, not in her features. That came from within. Generosity and sensuality combined into a delicious delight that was hard for men to ignore…especially him. More than once he’d fantasized about her. It couldn’t be helped. Even with the cooler than normal water temperature, his cock lengthened, hardened. Jesus, it didn’t matter how many times he told himself it would be impossible, that women like May were not for the likes of him, he couldn’t seem to shake the need that had coiled deep in his soul. Just the thought of her had his libido raging, his body ready to explode.

  Needing some relief, he stroked his penis, closing his eyes and imagining that May was in the shower with him. That full ass of hers would be slick with suds as he’d slip his hands up over the rounded globes. He would lick the water dripping from her nipples.

  She had full lips, and he imagined them gliding over his cock, pulling it into the warmth of her mouth. He continued to stroke as he thought of how her tongue would slip over the top of his balls, his cock, licking the precome from the hole.

  His balls drew up and his whole body tensed as he felt his orgasm shimmering just out of reach. He increased the rhythm of his strokes, thinking of the way he would slip his fingers through her hair. The long tresses would tangle between his digits as he thrust his hips, shoving his cock against the back of her throat. He groaned her name as he came. He collapsed against the wall, resting his head against the cool tiles. Even in completion he had no satisfaction, no relief. It had been like this for weeks, and it didn’t look to be improving. There was a reason he had spent his Friday night at Dupree’s.

  Evan pushed himself away from the wall and washed himself off. By the time he turned off the water and stepped out of the tub, he had himself under control. Almost.

  He looked at his face in the mirror, wondering just what the hell he needed to push past this. He had done it once, knew he could do it again, but something told him this time would be harder.

  Chapter Three

  May pulled the long black dress off the rack and studied it.

  “Oh,” Cynthia said. “That would look fantastic on you.”

  May snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure my ass would look spectacular.”

  Cynthia didn’t respond. May looked at her and wanted to cringe at the pity she saw in her friend’s eyes.

  “It isn’t right for me.”

  Cynthia shook her head. “I think it is. You have the tiniest waist and this would make it look great.”

  It would, May knew that much. And she really wanted something sexy, something that would make her feel sensual. It had been so long time since she had. But if she wasn’t comfortable, she wouldn’t be able to even feel sexy.

  “Just where would I wear it? I haven’t had a real date in months.” Cynthia opened her mouth but May shook her head. “I don’t count those fix-ups my father keeps making. I rarely go out a second time with any of those losers.”

  Cynthia laughed. “Only you would call some of those guys losers. Wasn’t the last one the owne
r of that new restaurant off of Pali Highway…the one with more money than God?”

  May nodded but didn’t say anything else. She knew there was something lacking in her, that she couldn’t respond to those men, that she couldn’t find something about them to turn her on. They were all basically good-looking, and Demetrius—the restaurant owner—had been gorgeous. But there was something there, something she couldn’t put her finger on, that turned her off. They’d all been the most polite, gentlemanly, gorgeous men. There had to be something wrong with her.

  She moved to put the dress back on the rack and Cynthia grabbed it out of her hand.

  “What—”

  Cynthia smiled. “I’m buying it for you, and someday I’ll force you to wear it. Let’s check out and go get some coffee and malasadas.”

  She opened her mouth to argue, but her friend just walked to the register and paid for the dress.

  “You shouldn’t have done that,” May said as Cynthia handed her the dress.

  She shrugged and smiled.

  “And don’t try that little innocent look on me, sistah. I’m not as gullible as the boss.”

  “Ha. Either way, it doesn’t matter. I bought it, so you’re stuck.” With that, she slipped her arm through May’s and dragged her toward the door. “Let’s go get some of those malasadas.”

  Twenty minutes later, they were relaxing in the warm Hawaiian morning sun, watching people wander by on Kahili road.

  “I’m going to have to learn how to get these fried right. When I make them, they are too heavy and greasy. Mine are not as good as these.” She took another big piece and then switched her attention to May. “Tell me what’s wrong with these men.”

  May shrugged. “They’re wonderful. In fact, I’d say any other woman would be happy with them.”

  Cynthia took another bite and stared at her while she chewed. She said nothing, and soon May shifted her weight.

  “Tell me.”

  With a sigh, May said, “They’re just not right.”

  “In what way?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Do they chew with their mouths open, wear too much cologne, compare you to their mother in bed?”

  May shook her head. It was hard to explain to another person, especially when she didn’t understand it herself. “So the sex sucks.”

  May laughed. “No. I mean…there’s no sex.”

  “None, as in you have never had sex?”

  “No, I’ve had sex, just not lately, and not with any of those men. Well, since Rick. Besides, I haven’t had much success in that area.”

  “What do you mean?”

  May paused and looked around. She wasn’t a prude, had always thought she would be a woman with a healthy sex drive. But she didn’t want anyone walking by to hear her discussing sex. In Honolulu, there was always a good chance someone who knew her would walk by and hear.

  “I never really enjoyed sex.”

  Cynthia frowned. “I don’t understand.”

  “I mean, I never…” Good Lord, she was blushing. She could feel her face heat. “Listen. You probably don’t understand, but I just never felt connected with a guy to be able to do that.”

  Cynthia smiled. “You’d be surprised. Until Chris, there had only been two guys, and those were awful experiences.”

  “But not with Chris.”

  Cynthia shook her head. “No. He let me control things there for awhile. I didn’t have control of anything in my life before Chris.”

  May knew there was something between them, something so deep it connected them in a way that no one could do anything to break them apart.

  “So you practice bondage.”

  “You know that. But we’re switches.”

  May nodded. She knew the terminology of the lifestyle. She’d been doing her best to learn about it for the past few months.

  “But I don’t think that’s for you,” Cynthia said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Honey, the one thing all of those guys had in common were they were gentlemanly. They probably let you pick where you went and what you did.”

  May nodded again, knowing it would do no good to lie to Cynthia. “They were…boring.”

  Oh, God, she felt awful saying it, but at the same time she felt so relieved to share the secret with someone.

  “Go on.”

  “They always waited for me to make a decision, where we would eat, what we would do. None of them seemed to be able make up their minds. I always seem to attract that kind of man.”

  “Makes sense. You have a strong personality.”

  May sighed. “I’m doomed.”

  Cynthia laughed. “No, but you might need to get a little more proactive about finding a man you can be attracted to. If not, your father will keep bringing home dates.”

  “Oh, God.”

  “Have you been reading up on BDSM?”

  May nodded. “I read that one book you gave me, been chatting online with some people. I think I might know what my problem is.”

  “You’re a submissive.”

  May looked around quickly to see if anyone had heard Cynthia. “Shhh, just what I need is someone calling my father and telling him I was talking about sex on the street with my best friend.”

  Cynthia laughed. “You make it sound like we’re using a bullhorn. No one knows what we’re talking about. You need to explore this side of you. You’ll never be happy unless you at least try.”

  “Great idea. But I don’t see any way to do that. I mean, I never attract that kind of guy. And I would not trust a stranger.”

  “You could join Rough ’n Ready.”

  She wished. “Too expensive.” That was an understatement. The club was well known on the island as one of the most exclusive clubs, and it had the price tag to match the reputation.

  “Maybe I can talk to Micah. He might cut the rate or something.”

  Hope speared through May, but it plummeted just as fast. “What the hell difference does it make? I would never be able to attract that kind of guy, then trust him enough for that.”

  “Listen, they have dedicated Doms there. It wouldn’t be so much of a date but more like an experience.”

  “I wouldn’t—”

  “Yeah, you would. Listen to me. The men there are trained. They know just the kind of buttons to push. The worst thing will be if you don’t respond and you find out that you aren’t really a submissive. At least you can explore it safely. It isn’t like you’re going to fall in love with any of these guys…or anyone you would date, not right off the bat. At least this way you can see if it gets you going.”

  It sounded simple, so easy, but… “What if my father finds out?”

  Cynthia snorted. “Then maybe he can find a man who will work.”

  “Cynthia. I really don’t know if you can understand, but Oahu is like a small town. Yes, we have close to a million people on the island, but everyone knows everyone else. It could get back to him.”

  “Micah and his partner took care of that. There’s a confidentiality clause in the contract.”

  “Once the word is out, it’s out. A rumor is as good as a news broadcast here on the island…”

  Cynthia shook her head. “If someone talks, he or she will get banned from the club…plus they have to pay a fine equal to one year’s membership.”

  “Which I point out one more time, I can’t afford. We’re comfortable, but Danny’s schooling isn’t cheap.”

  Cynthia smiled. “I’ll talk to Micah, and see what we can come up with.”

  Still, part of her hesitated. It was an excellent opportunity. Not many people get the chance to discover their inner self, find out just what they needed to feel complete. She had been fighting the feeling that she didn’t fit in, that something was lacking in her because she couldn’t respond to men. They were nice, they were attentive, and they let her take the lead in bed. God…they were boring. Or at least, boring to her. Other women seemed to have no problem with them.
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  It wasn’t like she’d never had an orgasm before. She had, plenty of times. Thanks to her battery-operated boyfriend and her erotic romances. It wasn’t until one nasty breakup that she’d discovered her appreciation of the alpha male and his dominant nature in an erotic romance book. A man who would control her in bed, take the lead and give her pleasure. Reading one of them had been the first time she’d come, and it had embarrassed her. But…she couldn’t deny it was the one thing that got her off. She had thought it was a fantasy, one that would stay that way. At least if she could figure out a way into Rough ’n Ready, she could figure out if it was the fantasy or the reality that got her off.

  “Well?”

  “Okay, call this Micah. Ask him if there is anything I can do to join at a lowered rate. I’m not going to be some kind of freaking sex slave though.”

  Cynthia offered her a mysterious smile. “I’m pretty sure nothing like that will be asked of you.”

  “What do you mean the police don’t have anything?” Evan boomed.

  Chris sighed, frustration fairly dripping from the sound. “They have no clues.”

  “The security cameras?”

  Chris shook his head. “Not a thing. Someone tampered with them.”

  Evan’s blood chilled at the announcement. “So someone planned this.”

  “Yeah, but I think we both knew that from the beginning.”

  Evan grunted but said nothing as his dark thoughts took over. The idea that someone had tampered with the cameras, then damaged her car…it made him want to destroy something.

  “The worst thing about it is HPD thinks the guy sat around waiting for her.”

  “Waiting for her?”

  Chris nodded. “Off over by the bushes there were a lot of cigarettes…a few footprints. I don’t buy into it though.”

  “Why not?”

  “Doesn’t make sense. I mean, why stand around after carving up her car.”

  That car had been May’s baby since she’d bought it three months earlier. He knew she’d saved the money, sacrificed, all to buy the convertible. Everyone in the restaurant knew it too.